It is said that God is omnipresent, omniscient and omnipotent. Sometimes we don’t understand and feel it. We as human-being feel proud of ourselves and think that we are the doer. Whatever work we do we think we are doing and not God.
Many of us feel that only weak person believe in God and they depend on God. These people think that God is blind, deaf and dumb.
We planned to go to Vaishnodevi shrine in the month of March as it is pleasant at that time. We nine members including my mother booked the ticket in Swaraj Express. My mother is 83 years old. All the members were disappointed when they heard that I‘ve booked the ticket for my mother. Even I was little hesitant to take her there. All my brothers and sisters were also against her trip as she had not travelled in train for many years. By train, it takes 30 hours to reach Jammu from Mumbai and from Jammu to Katra by bus. Everyone was worried, how she will go to toilet in train, how she will board on bus.
The day of the trip, we boarded the train and next day we reached Katra by bus. After reaching Katra, we went to hotel for dinner. We bathed and started for Vaishnodevi temple. We booked a Palki (Palanquin) for my mother and all of us sat on horses. It took 4 hours to reach by horse and 6 hours by palki. We all reached there early and waited for my mother. When she got down from the palki, we thought how she can walk 3Km more. When she just got down from Palanquin, her full body was shivering and her knees were shaking. “I think, I Can’t walk “she said. I got very nervous by looking at her condition. I thought, if anything happens here, what will I answer to everyone? After half an hour rest, I made her walk slowly. After walking for 15 minutes, it was impossible for her to walk further. So we made her to sit in a broad place and we walked towards the shrine. After an hour, when we came back, we made her sit in palki again and we reached down at 9.30 am in the morning next day. When palki came down, she was looking fresh and happy. That evening, we came to Jammu and stayed in hotel.
After reaching Mumbai, she just fell on the bed and did not utter a word. We really was worried and thought of calling a doctor. But she be-spoke, not to call a doctor. Full night she was groaning in pain.
Next day, when she woke up in the morning, she called me with a smiling face and said, “Yes Mata Vaishnodevi is still alive. I asked Mata to keep me alive till the shrine and when I was sitting there, one lady came and asked me to see the shrine and do the pranam as I wanted from my heart. I saw the temple and took Mata’s blessing.” My mother continued, ‘before reaching , I was praying to Mata that I should not trouble anyone — after returning back keep me on bed for three days and after three days I must be alright. She became alright after 3 days.
But I still can’t believe that she had seen the shrine. I learnt one thing from my mother that if you want something wholeheartedly it may be fulfilled.

Vaishno Devi, Jammu, India

Abuse

As I’m working as a counsellor for many years, I thought of writing about ABUSE. It came to my mind that I’ve to find out the real meaning of Abuse.

A ——Aggressive

B——Behaviour

U—–Useless

S—–Society

E—-Education

Abuse means:  Aggressive Behaviour is Useless for Society & Education.  It affects society and education indirectly. If someone is verbally abusing another, the children around them learn and get affected indirectly. If teacher is scolding some students, the children around them are effected mentally. Abuse means mistreat or treat badly, according to dictionary. It is a harm or maltreatment inflicted on a person through physical, verbal, emotional and sexual means. It is a rude and inhuman expression intended to offend or hurt e.g. when students commit any mistake they are abused verbally or emotionally.

I) Verbal abuse— Verbal abuse can be

a)-Any type of negative name calling e.g. Idiot, Stupid etc.

b) Any words of shame— Critical, sarcastic, mocking words.e.g if the child is fat and calling him Motu .

c) Yelling, swearing and screaming—if a teacher or parents scream at the child he feel ashamed d) verbally ballistic—e.g. bombastic words

e) Using threat e.g. if the child does not do his homework, locked in dark room or bathroom.

f) Blaming the victim—if bench falls down suddenly while playing and someone gets hurt (the person who planned the game)

g) Manipulating the action—if the teacher tells more negative about the child in front of the principal.

Identification of verbal abused

i)                    Shows sudden change in behaviour

ii)                  Some learning problem

iii)                Avoid the situation

iv)                Does not want to go school

II) Physical Abuse– Physical abuse are of many types

a) physical bruises &cuts — If teacher hits the child with ruler.

b) Cigarette burns-– Generally it happens at home.

c) Watching sleeping habit—Child can’t sleep due to physical pain.

d) Self destructive nature—Try to harm him and others.

Identification of physical Abuse

i)                    Avoid school

ii)                  Difficulties in walking &sitting

iii)                Weight loss—Not getting proper food

iv)                Distrust, Excessive efforts to please, shyness, fighting

v)                  Changing sleeping habit.

III) Psychological Abuse —-Mental harassment brings more traumas to the person. a) Emotional trouble— some people like to trouble the person emotionally, here the accused is troubled emotionally, so that other person does not make it out.

b) Name calling – negative name calling e.gthe child is criticised by sarcastic term or family behaviour.

Identification of psychological Abuse

i)                    Crying without any reason

ii)                  Not mixing with anyone

iii)                Not attending any celebration or function

iv)                Not participate in other activities.

IV) Sexual Abuse— Sexual contact between an adult and younger than eighteen years.

a) Feeling guilty— Sexually embarrassment in front of everyone can’t be tolerated.

b) There are many sexually abused children or women can’t disclose the fact to anyone.

Identification of sexually Abused

i)                    Try to avoid school

ii)                  All the time weeping

iii)                Not talking to anyone

iv)                Getting frightened of male

V) Social Abuse— Caste system, Infanticides, Comparison etc. If a person is from lower caste, told not to mix with the person. Girl child is killed in the womb or after birth.  Two co-sisters are compared.

Identification of Social Abuse

i)                    Low caste or high caste by the teacher in the class — Sitting arrangement of upper caste and lower caste.

ii)                  Mothers are comparing boys and girls at home and give inferior quality product to girl child.

iii)                Poor health.

iv)                Not mixing with anyone.

V) Hate Crime —-

1) Expression changes when teacher enters in the class.

2) Avoid class.

3) Request principal to change the division of the class.

We are born… and then one day we die. Isn’t that what we call life?? In this life we make choices and everything we do, consciously or unconsciously is a choice. The feeling of being the “do-er” of actions has been referred to as “ahem” or “ego”, and understanding the choices of action is what I refer to as “consciousness”. The more conscious we are, the more “awake” and with the awakening comes “singularity”, elsewhere referred to “bliss”, “peace” or “happiness”. The last few nouns are not antonyms of “misery”, “war” or “sadness” respectively, but just non-existence of all those opposites.

All through life, we have been accustomed to this sense of opposites through our senses. Thus language, thoughts, actions are all measured through opposites. If you are not happy, you are considered sad. If not successful considered failure. If not content means you are discontent. Actions, thoughts and life itself is not just “the way it is”, it is always “either-or” of these opposites. This write-up is to explain that it is we who choose life’s opposites and look at life through this lens of duality. I try to put reality in a perspective where we make choices between dualities and hence choose what we should-be or want to be in life.

When I first heard the phrase “You Live by Choice, Not by Chance”, it sounded in all glory that I was the “do-er” and I decide what happens in my life. I felt that if I choose to do “X”, I know I can get “Y”. So, I can predict all the consequences of all the actions which I chose to perform. Most people who believe they are the “do-er” believe so.  But what that cannot answer is why are there so many situations in life where we don’t know why something happened? Why do we become dejected that something that I expected to happen did not happen?? And that’s when we call ourselves a failure, because we only see duality.

We have something called intellect through which we make choices. Choices to not just do things, but more importantly to chose the consequences. Choice to look at the consequence through duality of success and failure or just look at it as an event. This choice in essence determines our actions, emotions and define our “being”. These choices design the path of our life, not through actions themselves, but how we choose to look at the consequence. Below is an interesting take of choices in life through the lens of NICK VUJICIC‘s life as an inspiration.

Prakash, a forty years old man lives with his wife and daughter in a small town near Parvani. He has his own business, an electronic shop. His business does not grow very well, but he is satisfied with what he has and tells his wife, “we are three members only, this is enough.”His wife Ragini is always happy with the family affair. His daughter’s name is Aditi. She is twelve years old and studying in a good school in eight standard.
Prakash lives in a bungalow with a big land around it. He planted mango tree around the land. Every year he plants one mango tree and it grows well within a year. His friend Mr. Olekar asks him,’ Tell, What is the secret of your mango tree my friend!
He smiles and says,” it’s nothing, its only love”. “Love? What are you talking asks Mr. Olekar to his friend. Prakash describes how he plants his mango tree. He takes the seed, make a thirty feet hole, put cow dung and affectionately put his warm hand on the seed and put it on the hole. After that covers it with the mud around.
Two weeks later, two tender leaves shake and appear. He waits till they grow a little. From that day he loves the tree like a child. He bathes it with water, wipes it tender care. Then when it grows little taller, he puts in more soil at the side of the plant. Every day he takes care of it, he sings song near the tree. It shakes its leaves when it hears the song. He sprinkles water as if it’s taking a bath and its father is taking care of it. After that he digs some of the soil from the side and puts some fresh soil near it. Then the tree grows almost up to waist line within two years. His joy knows no bound. Looking at the growing tree, Prakash’s eyes fills with tears
With love anything is possible. My dear friend, even with little love and care a tree grows faster. Though tree is a selfless product, it doesn’t expect anything from anyone, but it also understands the meaning of love.
Love is a state of mind or a mental expression which is very near to bliss. Showering love to anyone or anything gives happiness which cannot be achieved by any other means. Love is what you give, not what you want. Prakash feels that love can change the life of living being in this universe.
This article is for Valentine Day as Love has no boundaries

Attention means fixing the mind or thoughts on something. Attention is the basic need for all successful teaching. Attention is always present in conscious life and is common to all types of mental activity. It is a necessary condition for all types of mental activities. It is the concentration of consciousness upon one object or other. According to Ross,” Attention is the process of getting an object of thought clearly before the mind”

Domville has defined attention as—“It is the concentration of consciousness upon one object rather than upon another”. It is the weapon of teaching –learning process. It is the duty of a teacher to create interest, so that the child should be attentive in the class. If the child is attentive in the class, the teacher can motivate him to study well.

Involuntary Attention: It is a spontaneous attention. It does not require any effort on the part of an individual. E.g. sudden loud noise, a bright flash of light, mosquito bite, painful stimulation of any kind.

Voluntary or volitional attention: There is a conscious effort on our part. If a child takes pain to understand difficult sums, he voluntarily pays attention to the sums. In the examination hall, a student concentrates on the answer of a question and keeps away mind from distraction element like movement of the supervisor.

Non-volitional or Enforced attention: This type lasts as long as there is a stimulus. It is sustained because it appeals to our instinct. This type of attention is very common in small children. Curiosity attracts attention.

Spontaneous non-volitional attention: This type of attention develops on interest. The teacher has to just develop the desirable sentiments for things in the children.

Implicit volitional attention: This type of attention is obtained by introducing some motives such as rewards or punishments.

Explicit volitional attention: Repeated efforts are made to obtain the types of attention. E.g. preparing for an examination, a student makes repeated efforts to learn the portion.

Habitual Attention

During the course of our experience with several things, we are conditioned to attend certain stimuli. This type of attention is seen when one develops interest in the subject. His attention is always attracted towards the subject of his interest. The person who is having interest in singing will be attracted towards the concert. A naturalist is habituated to look for plants.

Mawlynnong   is the cleanest village in the world situated in eastern state of Meghalaya, India. The photo of the village was given on my site on 13th November.

Though traveling is a part of our life yet we miss so many things in our life. We all are really lucky as we visited such a paradise on earth. The eastern India is worth seeing. When we visited the place, I thought that God  lives  in the midst of forest. We believe that God lives in heaven. The heaven is no where else, it is in this place only.

I shall put  more photographs from my album to make you aware that you need not search heaven any where , it is here on Earth.

• Sensation of tiredness: If anyone works continuously, he is unable to concentrate on work and feels tired. Rabindranath Tagore says “This weariness forgive me oh! My Lord”.
• Less glycogen level: The decreased glycogen levels and the pressure of toxic substances in the blood cause fatigue.
• Lack of oxygen: During any muscular activity, oxygen from the blood cells is used and cause fatigue.
• Lack of Motivation: If the person is not motivated, his work efficiency becomes less and he experiences fatigue very easily.
• Lack of adequate sleep: Sound sleep is needed for good health. Lack of sound sleep affects work production and hence causes fatigue.
• Lack of Ventilation: Lack of proper ventilation affect the health, work efficiency and causes fatigue.
• Proper interest: If there is no interest in the work, it turns to be boring and causes fatigue.
• Illness: Long illness or sedative dose of medicine and has just recovered, gets fatigued easily.

Dysgraphia is a learning disability resulting to difficulty in expressing thoughts in writing.The student may not form words correctly and there is difficulty in writing within a certain space. It takes time to write neatly.

Writing involves several brain functions:

1) Vocabulary

2) Grammar

3)Hand-movement

Sign or the characteristics of Dysgraphia

1) Illegible handwriting- very bad handwriting.

2) Inconsistency– mixture of cursive and print letters.

3) Talk to self— murmurs.

4) Unfinished words & letters, omitted words.

5) Inconsistent in spacing words & letters.

6)  Cramped grip i.e unusual grip of pencil or pen.

7)  Give slope while writing.

Very slow at writing.

9) Random or not existent punctuation, spelling mistakes, errors in common suffixes.

Dealing with Dysgraphic children

a) Considering the rate of producing written work.

b)  Considering the volume of the work to be produced.

c) Considering the complexity of the writing task.

d) Considering tool used to produced the work.

e) Considering the format of the product.

Dyslexia is a condition where a child experiences severe difficulties in reading,he is unable to read. It is a language based disability in which the person has trouble in understanding words, sentences and paragraphs. The students have the problem to understand

i) letters

ii) group of letters

iii)  sentences or paragraph  e.g dog—bog

There are two major dysfunctions—

i) development specific disability—- biological condition comes from heredity.

ii) Acquired specific dyslexia—due to trauma, mental shock or injury

Problem

a) Surface— can read the word, but can not recognise the word.

b) Spelling— reads correctly, writes wrong.

c) Direct— jumps from one part to another. Skips words or sentences

All dyslexic do not have same symptoms, it could be:

i) Visual spatial

ii) Speech sound

iii) Correlating difficulty–problem with similar words e.g pear, pair

iv) Auditory dyslexia

v) Visual auditary—use visual and audio simultaneously.

Characteristics

1) Problem with left, right direction of the print. Gets confused.

2) Speech irregularities

3) Eating words while reading

4) Confusion with similar sounding words e.g–accept and except

5) Attention problem–short attention span

6) Poor ability to name objects

7) Poor ability to categorize objects

Difficulty in carrying out more than one instruction at a time.

9) Confusion with letters that look alike e.g p&q, b&d.

10) Difficult in understanding preposition related to alphabet e.g in & out.

11) Inability to recognize & recall written symbols.

12) Reverse letter e.g b&d.

13) Lack of automation in reading.

14) Forgets to cross letters e.g little as lillte.

Once a twenty five years old lady  Nisha took part in a elocution competition. She was a good orator, speaker and spoke very well in the competition. Everyone present in the hall appreciated her speech. One by one all the competitors spoke and competition got over. One of the competitors Sonali, spoke out of context and she was not enough confident about her topic to face the judges.

As soon as the competition got over judges started their  work, counted the marks and were ready to  announce the result.

Then the judges went to the stage and announced the name of the winners. When Nisha found her name in second positionwith Sonali winnig, she refused to take her prize. She started arguing with the judges as Sonali, spoke out of the topic. The judges remained silent and did not utter a word.

The organiser of the competition started arguing with Nisha. She started weeping and said that she did not want any prize for that. Sonali took her prize and went away.

When Nisha came home weeping, her mother asked her about the incident. Her mother consoled her and said,”You have done your job well. If you deserve, you will win everything in your life. God gives the thing at the right time. So don’t repent. No one can take your belongings. Whatever is yours that comes automatically to you”.

Later on after six months, when there was a inter collegeite competition, Nisha got first prize and Sonali did not get anything, Nisha realised that her mother was right.

So success comes if you really deserve it.