Babies are born with some basic capabilities and distinct temperaments. But they go through dramatic changes on the way to adulthood, and while growing old. According to Erik Erikson (1902-1994) we develop in psychosocial stages. Erikson emphasized developmental change throughout the human life span. In Erikson’s theory, eight stages of development unfold as we go through the life span. Each stage consists of a crisis that must be faced. According to Erikson, this crisis is not a catastrophe but a turning point of increased vulnerability and enhanced potential. The more an individual resolves the crises successfully, the healthier development will be.

Infancy — Age 0 to 1: Trust versus mistrust is Erikson’s first psychosocial stage, which is experienced in the first year of life. A sense of trust requires a feeling of physical comfort and a minimal amount of fear and apprehension about the future. Trust in infancy sets the stage for a lifelong expectation that the world will be a good and pleasant place to live.

Positive outcome: If their needs are met consistently and responsively by the parents, infants not only will develop a secure attachment with the parents, but will learn to trust their environment in general as well.
Negative outcome: If not, infant will develop mistrust towards people and things in their environment, even towards themselves. Eg. If Mother leaves the child at this crucial age.

Toddler — Age 1 to 2: Autonomy versus shame and doubt is Erikson’s second stage of development, occurring in late infancy and toddlerhood (1-3 years). After gaining trust in their caregivers, infants begin to discover that their behavior is their own. They start to assert their sense of independence, or autonomy. They realize their will. If infants are restrained too much or punished too harshly, they are likely to develop a sense of shame and doubt.

Positive outcome: If parents encourage their child’s use of initiative and reassure her when she makes mistakes, the child will develop the confidence needed to cope with future situations that require choice, control, and independence.
Negative outcome: If parents are overprotective, or disapproving of the child’s acts of independence, she may begin to feel ashamed of her behavior, or have too much doubt of her abilities. Eg. Parents or caretaker insults them or crack jokes in front of others.

Early Childhood — Age 2 to 6: Initiative versus guilt is Erikson’s third stage of development, occurring during the preschool years. As preschool children encounter a widening social world, they are challenged more than when they were infants. Active, purposeful behavior is needed to cope with these challenges. Children are asked to assume responsibility for their bodies, their behavior, their toys, and their pets. Developing a sense of responsibility increases initiative. Uncomfortable guilt feelings may arise, though, if the child is irresponsible and is made to feel too anxious. Erikson has a positive outlook on this stage. He believes that most guilt is quickly compensated for by a sense of accomplishment.

Positive outcome: If parents are encouraging, but consistent in discipline, children will learn to accept without guilt, that certain things are not allowed, but at the same time will not feel shame when using their imagination and engaging in make-believe role plays.
Negative outcome: If not, children may develop a sense of guilt and may come to believe that it is wrong to be independent. Eg. Over-ambitious and over-protective parents.

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Elementary and Middle School Years — Age 6 to 12: Industry versus Inferiority is Erikson’s fourth developmental stage, which takes place from age 6 to 11, involves the shift from whimsical play to a desire for achievement and completion. A child learns that he receives praise and recognition for doing well in school and completing tasks and also realizes he can fail at these tasks as well.

Positive outcome: If children can discover pleasure in intellectual stimulation, being productive, seeking success, they will develop a sense of competence.
Negative outcome: If not, they will develop a sense of inferiority. Eg. Teacher or parent use negative adjective of discouragement

Adolescence — Age 12 to 18: Identity versus Identity Confusion is Erikson’s fifth developmental stage, wherin adolescents begin to seek their true identities and a sense of self. The central question of this stage is of course, “Who am I?”.

Positive outcome: If the adolescent solves this conflict successfully, he will come out of this stage with a strong identity, and ready to plan for the future.
Negative outcome: If not, the adolescent will sink into confusion, unable to make decisions and choices, especially about vocation, sexual orientation, and his role in life in general.

Eg. Teacher or parent  to be a friendly and Faithful guide to reason life analytically.

Young Adulthood — Age 19 to 40: Intimacy versus isolation is Erikson’s sixth developmental stage, which individuals experience during the early adulthood years. At this time, individuals face the developmental task of forming intimate relationships with others. Erikson describes intimacy as finding oneself yet losing oneself in another. If the young adult forms healthy friendships and an intimate relationship with another individual, intimacy will be achieved; if not, isolation will result.

Positive outcome: Adult individuals can form close relationships and share with others if they have achieved a sense of identity.
Negative outcome: If not, they will fear commitment, feel isolated and unable to depend on anybody in the world.

Eg. One sided love affair and fantasy. Young adult fall prey for adulation and support charismatic forms.

Middle Adulthood — Age 40 to 65: Generativity versus stagnation is Erikson’s seventh developmental stage, which individuals experience during middle adulthood. A chief concern is to assist the younger generation in developing and leading useful lives- this is what Erikson means by generativity. The feeling of having done nothing to help the next generation is stagnation.

Positive outcome: People can solve this crisis by having and nurturing children, or helping the next generation in other ways.
Negative outcome: If this crisis is not successfully resolved, the person will remain self-centered and experience stagnation later in life.

Late Adulthood — Age 65 to death: Integrity versus despair is Erikson’s eighth and final developmental stage, which individuals experience during late adulthood. In the later year of life, we look back and evaluate what we have done with our lives. Through many different routes, the older person may have developed a positive outlook in most of all of the previous stages of development. If so, the retrospective glances will reveal a picture of a life well spent, and the person will feel a sense of satisfaction-integrity will be achieved. If the older adult resolved many of the earlier stages negatively, the retrospective glances likely will yield doubt or gloom- the despair Erikson talks about.

Positive outcome:If the adult has achieved a sense of fulfillment about life and a sense of unity within himself and with others, he will accept death with a sense of integrity. Just as the healthy child will not fear life, said Erikson, the healthy adult will not fear death.
Negative outcome: If not, the individual will despair and fear death.

Erikson does not believe that the proper solution to a stage crisis is always completely positive. Some exposure or commitment to the negative end of the person’s bipolar conflict is sometimes inevitable- you cannot trust all people under all circumstances and survive, for example. Nonetheless, in the healthy solution to a stage crisis, the positive resolution dominates.

It is difficult to imagine what we have not seen. No one has seen God in this world yet. So it is difficult to imagine God.

We imagine God as our mother, father or friend etc. Whatever way  we  like to see Him. We imagine devil or evil as big head, dark complexion etc because from our childhood it has been portrayed and feared in this manner. When we imagine alien from other planet, we imagine them as we have seen them in movies.

The person who first created devil, alien, God etc in his mind and created them in our mind for us to believe in that manner.

Always my mind asks, who is God? If god is not a figure then what he is. Why are we addressing him as He?  If he does not have a figure or body, then why are we addressing masculine gender?

Many people researched and said that He is Paramatma ( soul of souls). Human being has a soul, which can be felt  by its performance. The soul exists in human body. Then where does Paramatma live? How does He perform  his duties? Example can be taken as electricity, where we see that electricity begins from a particular point and ends with the light in the bulb. When air blows we see the leaves stir. Where is He then?

Everyone in this world imagine according to their capacity. Many believe that there are five Dham   (Place) where souls live. They are — Swagolok (Heaven), Vaikunthalok, Paralok, Tapalok, Shivalok. Who decides where the the soul has to live? Is it the soul itself who decide where it has to go according to its action or reaction?

That is why, it is my only wish to see God in his actual form.

As election is closer, everyone has a doubt in their mind, who to vote. First of all,we should  know the meaning of vote.

Vote is the expression by which we express our choice. Vote is necessary in a democratic system. But if we keep the following points in our mind while expressing ourselves,we may not choose the  wrong path or may not feel unhappy.

1. Vote a person of a good character, who believes in Truth ( does not mean that he never  lies , Truth means e.g the sun rises in the east i.e the fact )
2. Vote a person, who has empathy not the sympathy.
3. Vote a person who is really an Indian. (In body, mind & soul )
4. Vote a person who is having foresight.
5. Vote a person who believes in spirituality and thorough about politics.
6. Vote a person who is a philosopher and  a real educator.
7. Be analytic to judge the cunning behind a sweet smile.
8. Vote a person who thinks for mass not for his\her family only.
9. Vote a person who can provide selfless service without caste ,creed and religion.

If you want to see God, observe yourself properly.

People describe the religion and spirituality as same. Religion involves some ritualistic exercise. In religion, people use some institution where they can perform some kind of ritualistic exercise. I have some view about these two doubtful connotations.

Religion cannot change the inner enemies.

Everyone in this world has some goal in life and a question in their mind. Spirituality is the answer for it.

This human life is a drama, whatever role we get we have to perform that well. But how to perform it well? As a human being we have our consciousness, mind, intellect etc. By using them in a correct way, we are free to choose our own building, dress, rituals, belief etc. and perform the role well.

Terrorist choose the wrong building where the foundation is not concrete and falls down after some days. They do not use their intellect and believe in wrong ideas. They always go against truth i.e. day lights up as knowledge and night stumbles towards ignorance. These are within us.

Primary  Laws:

1) Law of Contiguity     —-   e.g. Gitanjali  we associate with  great poet Rabindranath Tagore.

2) Law of similarity       —-   e.g. Some similarity of  sound   bank-rank.

3) Law of Contrast        —-   e.g. White x black

4) Systematic Relation —-   e.g.  Higher thought process

a) part and whole        e.g whole poem and part of it

b) cause and effect     e.g. study and its result

c) quality and its use  e.g. soap Dove and its association

Secondary Laws:

1) Law of Primacy—–      first impression and association  e.g. Dress of a person

2) Law of Intensity—-      impression that is extreme in degree  e.g. Harsh incident of childhood

3) Law of Recency—-       recent impression and association occur  e.g. Recent terrorist attack

4) Law of Frequency—      more frequently impression is made and association is formed  e.g. Bat - ball

5) Law of Mood      —       general tendency of mental activity , attitude of an individual  e.g. Angry kind

of a person and association

Soul  is difficult   phenomenon

Mind is no longer known

Conciousness is a misconception

Then what is real?

Is it then  the  behaviour

Or thoughts, feeling and intellect?

Teacher has to think

The action which are performed

Or its the stimulus response

To know all these hidden facts

Come along with me

And jointly let us know

The  Word Psychology

A boy named Satya was eight years old when he lost his father. His mother did not  have enough money to look after her son. She was working in somebody’s house and looked after their child. She was a very reliable lady and everyone in their neighbourhood loved her .

Satya  was an average student. He studied in fourth standard when his mother become very sick. He used to go with her to the doctor. Every time he went to doctor he thought of becoming a doctor. While sleeping he used to pray to god to become a doctor. In this way a year passed . Day by day his mother become more sick. One unlucky day his mother passed away and he became an orphan. His teachers became  little  kind towards him and started helping him in his studies.

At the age of fifteen he passed his schooling and took admission in college. But his aim to become a doctor was still in his mind. He always used to think of helping the needy. He started studing very hard to become a doctor. This way the result of twelve standard was declared and he passed with flying colours.  But he had to appear for common entrance test again. This way the entrance test’s result came out and he got a chance to take admission in private college. He was disappointed as he knew that he can not take admission in private college. With a disappointed mind, he roamed here and there and met some social organization. Some of them had given him some hope.

At last, with a tired mind when he was sitting in a restaurant, the owner noticed this boy and came near him. He asked Satya ,” whats the matter my child’?  “I  noticed you for a long time”. Satya told him the condition he was facing.

The owner of the hotel called him home next day. The next day Satya met the man at his residence. He was ready to  bear the cost of his course. Satya could not believe his ears when he heard the man first. Satya asked the man “Do you have any condition for it?” I would like to fulfil all the condition you put on me “. The man smiled and answered, I was searching for a brilliant child whom I can give my hard earned money for his studies”.  Satya started sobbing and bowed down and said, “my both parents died of poverty, but I wanted to become a doctor from my childhood. But I did not know that I will find a god father in my life”.

Satya took admission in medical college and within five years he became a doctor. After he become a doctor he started practicing in a rural area and serving the poor. His dream completed which he saw in his childhood . He never thought of any thing else other than becoming a doctor.

Fill the mind with correct option, analyse it and start working on it. Surely it will be fulfilled.

Whatever you think, you become. This is the truth of the universe.

You are the MAKER OF YOUR OWN FORTUNE.

Mawlynnong   is the cleanest village in the world situated in eastern state of Meghalaya, India. The photo of the village was given on my site on 13th November.

Though traveling is a part of our life yet we miss so many things in our life. We all are really lucky as we visited such a paradise on earth. The eastern India is worth seeing. When we visited the place, I thought that God  lives  in the midst of forest. We believe that God lives in heaven. The heaven is no where else, it is in this place only.

I shall put  more photographs from my album to make you aware that you need not search heaven any where , it is here on Earth.

Mawlynnong Guest House

Mawlynnong, Meghalaya, India Entry

There was a school boy named Robin. He had a good voice, so he used to take part in singing competitions in school. As he grew to adolescence, he asked his teacher one day,
“I don’t like singing, I want to become a Rock Star”.
“Good you can” answered the teacher.
“Rock stars have a lot of money. I want only money in my life”, said Robin to the teacher.
The teacher was only carefully listening and observing him. After a few days again he came near her and said, “Miss you know, rock star has lot of money. I have seen an interview on TV. They showed his bungalow, his car, everything. I am really fascinated by seeing his life style. The ordinary singer only earn limited money”.
Teacher replied, “Don’t be attracted so much. All that glitters is not gold”.
Then he said, ” I know, everyone thinks like that, but I know, money can Talk, money is everything in life”. The teacher did not tell him anything.
Several years passed. The teacher still remembered Robin. One day she met Robin’s mother in the market. The mother asked the teacher, “Actually, I was eager to meet you for some reason. See God is so great that I met you unknowingly”.
“What’s the matter”, said the teacher.
“Can you come to my place, if you have time, I stay near by”. The teacher was really a helpful natured lady. So she agreed to visit her place immediately. When they reached there, she saw there all the instrument, what are required for a musician. She was happy in her mind.
As soon as they reached and sat down for conservation, Robin’s mother started weeping. Seeing her condition, the teacher felt awkward to ask anything. Many questions came to her mind. She consoled his mother and asked, “What’s the matter?”
“Robin is out of my hand now, he is really a spoil child, takes money, if I refuse to give, he abuses me, he even started robbing valuables from home” the mother said. Meanwhile the doorbell rang. The mother opened the door. A long haired, with ear ring, shirt button opened, a vagabond boy entered the room. When the teacher saw the boy he said, “Oh! Teacher, when did you come?” What a pathetic condition of the boy, who was a brilliant boy in his childhood. The teacher thought for a moment. Meanwhile the mother told of his father’s ill health also. He was still repeating the same thing. “Teacher you know, money is the most important thing in ones life, you have to earn this money in any way. That brings happiness”.

She left their house immediately. After reaching home, the teacher thought of the condition of his parents. His mother told that he got chance to study medicine, but he was not interested. His mother requested the teacher to help her to get her son back.
Two days later, she got a phone call from Robin’s mother that her husband was admitted in the hospital. The teacher thought, this was the right time to talk to Robin. So she proceeded towards the hospital. When she arrived at the hospital, Robin was not there. She was really astonished. But she decided, ‘now I have to help his parents’. She called Robin and told him to meet her at her residence and gave the residence’s address. Duly he came to meet her. She asked him, “Are you happy?” He did not say anything. She said, “Money is what all need, but ‘money is everything’ is wrong. For every desire, you have to draw a line. Every desire should have a limit. Otherwise you will be dissatisfied always. You should know where to draw the line. You should train yourself for that. That is why a child should be trained from childhood to analyze everything. Then it is easier for him to draw a line of his limitation. If you don’t know where to draw a line, for every act, then you will be unsuccessful and unhappy and you will not achieve your goal”.
Robin listened attentively and told, “Now my father is in hospital, if I would have enough money, I could have put him in a better hospital. Rock-stars have Rolls-Royce car, all the comfort, isn’t it?” asked Robin.
The teacher replied, “Yes my child! They have Rolls-Royce, if money would be everything, Rock-stars would not die, moneyed people would have lived for ever. Your parents are more important for your life. Your mother knows her limitation, she has enough money to spend for your father’s treatment. I will not discourage you to become a Rock-star, but they have their ups and downs. Whatever you see is not always true. Everyone on this earth are born for some or the other reason. Yes, disappointment comes, but you have to analyze and find out the work which is actually for you”.
“First of all, at this moment, your concern should be for your father’s health and not money. Money comes and goes and it is important for everyone, but it is not necessary to become a Rock star and earn money. Robin, you are so talented. Why don’t you open your own band and start performing in a small way?”

Water rolled down Robin’s cheek, for few minutes he did not utter a word, then he said, “That is why, I respect you a lot teacher. You showed me the right way. I will form a group band and earn according to my capacity.

Money may be every thing, one should know where to draw a line.